Ranking All the 2012 Films I Watched
I've become an expert at watching only films that I think
will be good and having it turn out that way.
2012 was a great year for good films – not a great year for great film. I enjoyed nearly every single movie I saw put
out last year, a feat I didn't know was possible. That is why, instead of making a top ten or
top twenty list, I decided to rank all of the films I saw from last year. I will try my hardest to leave at least a
couple comments for each film. And
hopefully, in 2013, I will have enough motivation to really start giving full-length
reviews for many of the films I see.
Also, to make it more interesting, I've grouped the films in
tiers, because I wanted to show which films I thought were elite and which ones
I thought were in categories below elite. Here's how my categories work: Tier 1
= elite, Tier 2 = near elite, Tier 3 = very, very good films, Tier 4 = films that were good but were
missing one or two elements to make them great, Tier 5 = slightly- above
average films, Tier 6 = average films, entertaining enough but nothing to write
home about, Tier 7 = not very good films.
I think it is incredible that it is only Tier 7 movies that I didn't
enjoy. And now my list.
Tier 1
1. The Master – There is only one really relevant American
director working right now: Paul Thomas
Anderson. He has written and directed
the three best films of the past 12 years:
Punch Drunk Love, There Will Be Blood, and The Master. I say he is the best because he is the only
American director right now that I would safely say is a true artist in every
sense of the word. A true artist, to me,
is someone who knows exactly how to balance the qualities of his or her
work: subtly vs. heavy-handedness, ambiguity
vs. explicitness, complexity vs. simplicity, provocation vs. quietness, moralistic
vs. pure entertainment, etc. But most of
all a true artist needs to be able to work with tension properly. Tension between fathers and sons, between
family, between friends, between lovers,
and between fellow human beings. This is
where Anderson excels.
The Master also features the best all around acting this
year. My favorite performance this year
is Philip Seymour Hoffman as Lancaster Dodd, the L. Ron Hubbard cult-leader
character. He wears every emotion so
masterfully (sorry for the pun) in his face.
He is all-at-once compassionate, violent, angry, loveable, quiet,
charismatic and energetic. Which makes
his performance a more rounded human one than any other actor this year.
The Master also contains the top four scenes of the year (the
department store sequence, the first processing scene, the jail-cell scene and
the ending Slowboat to China moments).
But this film will not be for everyone. The last half of the film can be frustrating
and confusing. The lead character, played by Joaquin Phoenix, is not a very
likable guy which makes it hard for us to follow him around everywhere. The ideas explored in the movie are not ideas
that are common and/or acceptable to explore.
These things make The Master a challenge to watch. But I love a good
challenge.
2. Django Unchained
– If you loved Inglorious
Basterds you should love this movie.
That is really all I have to say.
This movie does what all good Tarantino films do: they entertain you, put you in an unusual
world with colorful characters, mix genres, draw out wonderful performances,
excite you, push the boundaries of history and timelines, are wonderfully
violent and funny. In other words Django
is more of the same. But that is not a
bad thing in the slightest.
Also, this
is probably my favorite Leo Dicaprio performance ever.
3. The Dark Knight Rises – Anyone who knows me knows I'm a Batman
fanatic. I have near 500 Batman comic
books. I wish I had a couple of hours so
I could type all of the ways that Christopher Nolan took a half-dozen of my
all-time favorite Batman stories and artfully weaved them together into a very,
very good film. This is the best of the
trilogy. There were so many nice touches
and so much storyline and characters that were packed into two-and-a-half hours
that I am in awe of it. Sure, I can
admit it's flawed. But no one on planet
earth could make a superhero movie that is this incredibly dens, with so much going
on, and that is still very entertaining.
Also, as a
final note, I was really, very nervous that Ann Hathaway was Catwoman, but she stole every scene she was in and was
one of the best reasons to watch the movie.
4. Compliance – I, simultaneously, want to tell you
to watch and to not to watch this film.
This film and Killer Joe are the two movies that will make you so
uncomfortable that you might just not trust my judgment in film any
longer. DO NOT WATCH THIS FILM IF YOU
DONT LIKE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE.
Okay, now that I'm finished with the disclaimer, let me tell
you why this is my number four film. I
have never had an experience after watching a film the same way that I had with
this one. I literally could not get this
film out of my head for three or four days after watching this. The subject
matter is so disturbing and not in any pornographic or violent way. The subject matter is simply the honest
expose of the darkest characteristics of humanity. I didn't understand what “regular” human beings
were capable of doing. And because this
story is based on true events it helped me understand some of histories most
notorious blemishes.
Compliance is about a phone call received to a fast food
restaurant. The person on the other end
claims to be a police officer and that one of the employees of the restaurant
stole some money and that this employee needs to be detained. Things quickly spin out of control from
there. That is all I'm going to say
about the plot. This film probably would
not work as well without the amazing performance by Ann Dowd as the manager of
the fast food place. Hers was probably
the best female performance of the year.
5. Killer Joe – I'm a little sadistic, that is why
I loved this William Friedkin film. The
warning from above also applies to this film:
Do not watch it if you don't want to be uncomfortable. I hate to say it but Matthew McConaughey is
becoming one of my favorite actors. He
is really very good as Killer Joe and Juno Temple is also very good in her role
as well.
The premise
is that these two hick brothers want to collect on their mom's life insurance
so they hire a man to murder her. This film is crazy. It goes places that the mind shouldn't
travel. And that is why I loved it. (Don't be mad at me if, after watching this
film, you never want to eat at KFC again).
6. Beasts of the Southern Wild – If I have
sufficiently warned you away from the last two films, this is the one for
you. This film won the Grand Jury Prize
at Sundance last year and I can see why.
This film has both style and substance.
It's heartbreaking and happy.
It's bombastic and gentle. It's
old-fashioned but current.
I loved this
film because I love the movies to take me to new, wonderful places, places that
are colorful, exotic, with characters that you love. Beasts does this. We are instantly transported just outside the
levies of New Orleans in a place called the Bathtub. It's a story about a very poor but close
community of people who try to survive and overcome a very difficult situation.
7. Cloud Atlas – If you haven't noticed, I can be
prone to hyperbole. However, I don't
know if I'm exaggerating when I say that this is the most ambitious film ever
made. While I was watching it I couldn't
believe that filmmakers could coordinate such an effort. This had to make it in my top ten list just because
it is so ambitious.
This movie
is a collage of six separate but interconnected storylines from six different
eras. The crazy thing about this film is
that these six storylines are constantly switching back and forth in the movie,
weaving a seemingly impossible single cohesive story. But it ends up being very cohesive. This film could have been a disaster, but the
fact that the Wachowski's made this work, and work well, is a miracle in and of
itself.
But that
doesn't mean that this movie doesn't have its flaws. There are definitely some stories that are
more entertaining than others. And I
really didn't care too much for Tom Hanks as one of the lead actors. Also, because some of the actors had multiple
roles in the movies, their changing faces and hairstyles got to be distracting
and would sometimes pull me out of the film.
But I can honestly say that this was very much worth watching and that
this is the film that this year that I most look forward to watching
again.
Tier 2
8. Cabin in the Woods – I wrote that The Master had
the four best scenes of the year, well, this movie has the fifth best and if
you've seen it you know exactly which one I mean. This was just all-around fun and absurd, with
a lot of laughs, frights and surprises.
9. Flight – From the trailer of this film I knew exactly what the ending was going to be. I knew exactly where this film was going, but boy was I surprised and delighted how it got there. This could have been a really generic, cookie-cutter, overly-moralistic look about personal responsibility and self-discipline, blah blah blah. Thank goodness it wasn't and thank goodness it was anchored by probably the best actors on the planet, Denzel Washington.
I really
thought that this film was going to be pretty bad, that Robert Zemeckis would
show us throughout the entire move footage of the plane crash. But what was surprising is that the film was
never really interested in the crash, it was never interested with the
spectacle. But it was interested in the
characters and their demons and struggles.
And that is very unusual for a big Hollywood film.
10. Zero Dark Thirty – I almost feel like this movie
has to be on everyone's top ten list. It
just has to. Kathryn Bigelow just makes
such solid films. She's like the Bill
Belichick of movies. She might not
always make the best films of the year, but she's always in the
conversation. For me, I love her moves
because of the very interesting ideas she pursues. The leads in her films have such a drive to
accomplish a goal/many goals that when there are no more goals to be
accomplished they are left empty and lost.
This is such an interesting idea.
I want to gripe a little though. Not about the film but the reaction to the
film. Bigelow is not endorsing
torture. This is such a matter-of-fact
depiction of the way that America extracted information from captured enemies
that it is incredible that idiots would say that this film even comes close to
being pro-torture. It happened, Bigelow
documented it, get over it. Great film.
11. End of Watch – Chemistry is often very vital to
the success of a movie. Often times, in
romantically-inclined films, everything hinges on the relationship between the
two lovers (or potential lovers).
However, when you can point to the incredible chemistry between two
characters in a film not about romance, that is when you know you have a
special movie.
Michael Pena
and Jake Gyllenhaal are so good together, there seems to be no doubt in my mind
that they are probably best friends in real life. Often times a film wants you to care about
the main characters so that there can be a big emotional payoff at the
end. And often times those films fail. End of Watch succeeds in spades. Just please don't dash my hopes that Pena and
Gyllenhaal aren't bestest of friends.
Please.
Tier 3
12.Take This Waltz – I started hating this film
halfway through it. I said to myself,
“here's another white people, first-world problems indie flick.” But after the credits rolled, I realized
that, although I was mostly right, the film was something much more and hit me
on a more personal level. I would
recommend this movie to anyone who has been in a relationship for what they
feel like has been a long time.
The acting is good, but, as usual, Michelle Williams stands out. And there is also a really creative, unusual
and fun sex scene at the end.
13. Secret World of Arietty – My favorite animated
film this year. A really fun
premise. Great execution. Really good voice-over work. A story about miniature people (only a couple
inches tall), who refer to themselves as “Borrowers.” These Borrowers try to survive in a hostile
home of regular size people.
14. Jiro Dreams of Sushi – I
love films about people who are really dedicated to their craft. This documentary shows you the dedication it
takes to be the best. It is really
inspiring but also a bit frightening to realize just how far a person has to go
to be on top.
15. Your Sister's Sister – I
love Mark Duplass (I'm obsessed with The League), Emily Blunt, Rosemary Dewitt
and Lynn Shelton. Watching them work and
act together was a fun experience.
16. Amour – Michael Haneke makes devastating films
and this movie is no exception. But it
feels different than your usual Haneke provocative effort. In this Palm d'Or award winning film, he
examines the arduous and painful effects of helping a loved one as they
die. There are some truly heartbreaking
scenes in this one.
17. Ted – This flick has the funniest premise of the
year. A child's teddy bear, who comes to
life, grows up with him, becoming his pot-smoking, best-friend roommate. This was probably the funniest flat-out
comedy of the year.
18. Pitch Perfect – I have to admit, I'm kind of a
little obsessed about this movie. It is
really good. Like really good. Like I wish I had enough balls to move this
up higher on my list but I'm too afraid of looking girly. It's funny.
The A Capella scenes are really entertaining and Anna Kendricks is the
coolest, most awesome human being in existence right now. Okay, okay, let me turn down my fifteen year
old self. But really, if you want to
have a good time, rent this movie.
19. Wuthering Heights – This is a hard movie to
remember from the haze of my 2012 Sundance experience. But I think I liked it enough to put it this
high on my list.
20. Looper – My most anticipated movies of 2012 year
were as follows: The Master, Django
Unchained and Looper. Well, I got two of
those movies right. But it's not that I
don like Looper, cause I really do. But
I had such high expectations for this film that I was a little let down with
the effort. I mean, did you see the
trailer for this thing? It looked as if
it would be the greatest film since Citizen Kane. But it didn't end up being that.
But I think
I know where this film went wrong.
Everything in the film, the momentum, the action, the excitement, etc
etc, seemed to slow down when Joseph Gordon Levitt goes to Emily Blunts farm
halfway through the film. From then on,
Director Rian Johnson seemed content to kind of phone this movie in. I kind of hope that there is some directors
cut to this film in the future where the action never stops and slog at the
farm is a distant memory.
21. Moonrise Kingdom – Wes Anderson directed
this. His best film since Life
Aquatic. But since you probably didn't
like Life Aquatic like I did, then it is his best film since Rushmore (yes, I
don't really care for The Royal Tenenbaums).
Wes Anderson
is like Quentin Tarantino in regards to that both filmmakers are very good at
what they do but they really don't try much of anything new. Anderson is good at coordinating the music,
the storyline, the acting, the style, the clothing and dialogue into a
perfectly fun and quirky mixture.
22. Safety Not Guaranteed – The chemistry between
Mark Duplass and Audry Plaza shouldn't work on paper but it works excellent
here. I also really liked Jake Johnson
in his role. Just a really fun and funny
film.
23. Chronicle –
Sometimes, during the first few months of the year, I forget that
Hollywood knows how to put out good films.
This film was a welcome respite from the dreck that the movie studios
were pumping out. Plus I love superhero
movies that aren't really superhero movies (think Unbreakable).
24. Seven Psychopaths – Such a fun movie by the
director that gave us In Bruge. If you
like In Bruge but thought it wasn't absurd enough then you will love this
film. Very funny parts.
Tier 4
25. Holy Motors – If I were to watch this again,
this might easily make it into my top 10.
The performance by Denis Lavant was so incredible, it might be the best
performance of the year (besides performances in The Master). This film was so unusual that it was jarring
and, in the moment, I couldn't make heads-or-tails of things. Some of the scenes were so incredible (Type
“Accordion Holy Motors” into YouTube) that they force you to live those moments
over and over in your head.
This is essentially a story of a man who drives around in a
limo all day long with a bunch of wigs, makeup and different kinds of clothes
and costumes and impersonates different people for a reason that is not at all apparent.
Does it sound kind of strange, well you don't even know the half of
it.
26.The Avengers – This is lower on my list because
I did not think it was as good the second or third times I watched it. But it was still impressive that Joss Weedon
could coordinate a half-dozen or so Superheros and make it feel like each
superhero got his or her day in the sun.
27. The Amazing Spider-Man – I was surprised that I liked this as much as
I did. I'm one of the few, I feel, that
really didn't care if they rebooted this superhero or not. I just hope that one of these days we can
have a superhero movie that doesn't have to go through the origin story in the
first episode, because the story was just too much like Sam Raimi's first
Spiderman.
28. Skyfall – Bond is Bond. I never get too excited for these films but
this one was a pretty good effort with some great actions scenes and really
good cinematography.
29. Premium Rush – This film was really very
thrilling. Who knew that a show about
people chasing each other on bikes could be so captivating? The end was a bit formulaic and corny but the
bike chase sequences more than made up for some of the more unbelievable and
unimpressive plot.
30. ParaNorman – I didn't hear a lot of people
talking about this one, which is a shame, because it is really very good. I've already seen in three times and it
hasn't even been out a half a year. Very
rewatchable.
31. Chasing Ice – This was a pretty important and
shocking documentary. For all of you
that still don't believe that Global Warming (aka. Climate Change) is a real
thing. Please educate
yourselves by watching this because it is much more compelling than An Inconvenient Truth.
32. Jeff, Who Lives at Home – I watched this on
Netflix and was really surprised about how good it was. It is a slightly better-than-average comedy
in a wasteland (Netflix) of average to less-than-average comedies.
33. Brave – A middle of the road Pixar film. I feel that they still need to redeem
themselves after the debacles that were the Cars series. This at least points them in the right direction.
34. Wreck-it-Ralph – I usually rank animated films
pretty high because I enjoy them. This
year seems to be loaded with good animated films but not great ones. I liked this film mainly because the
voice-over work and creativity was really good and also I really like the
chemistry between Ralph and Vanellope.
But it could have been funnier.
35. Oslo, August 31st – This should be
higher on my list but I feel absolutely no connection to the
drug/party/hedonistic/nightclub/young adult Euro-culture that has existed for
the last twenty or so years. But it is a really well made film and is a good
expose of the effects of those that have lived that lifestyle.
36. L – No one who reads this list will ever see
this film. I watched this film because I
really enjoyed the Greek film Dogtooth, whose screenwriter wrote this
film movie. This film isn't as dark or funny
as Dogtooth but it has some really good scenes.
Tier 5
37. Argo – I don't understand the hype. The ending was pretty terrible. The way the filmmakers forced so much drama
made me just shake my head in disbelief of the whole effort. It was a good story and parts of the film
were really interesting – not Affleck's performance though.
38. Sleepwalk With Me – This is another slightly
better-than-average comedy.
39. Bernie – This is an average comedy. If you can call it a comedy.
40. 21 Jump Street – A lot funnier than I was
expecting. I would have had this a lot
higher on my list if the second half of this film would have match the laughs
of the first half.
41. The Hunger Games – A good adaptation of a pretty average
book. Nothing special though, except for
Jennifer Lawrence's performance.
42. Limitless – There was a lot of plot holes in
this film; however, this movie really made me think and raises some really good
questions.
43. Dredd - A better action film than the trailer
makes it out to be.
44. Hello I Must Be Going – One of those Sundance
films that I remember liking but were kind of lost in the fog of what was
festival fatigue.
45. The Grey – A decent movie about survival. I really have not liked Liam Neeson very much
lately but he is actually the best reason to watch this film.
46. John Dies at the End – Some really, really funny
moments, wrapped into a lot of really muddled, not so funny moments. But the good definitely outweighed the bad.
47. The Pirates:
Band of Misfits – I really liked it but I had thought, going in to it,
that it would be better.
48. Robot and Frank – Just a really fun, cute
Sundance film.
49. V/H/S – A hit and miss movie. Some of the horror stories were effective,
some were not. It was pretty damn scary
though and it was really fun to watch it at midnight during Sundance.
Tier 6
50. Celeste and Jesse Forever – a good, but not very
memorable Sundance flick. I do really
remember liking the unconventional ending though. If I saw it again I might rank it higher.
51. Frankenweenie – Tim Burton is up to his old
tricks. The film was fun. But every recent Burton film just seems like
average, predictable Burton.
52. Prometheus – I had a fun time with this controversial in the
theater but it is not a good thing when six months later I can barely recall
anything memorable from the film except for Michael Fassbender's great
performance.
53. Queen of Versailles – This documentary seemed to
want you to like two really despicable, pathetic people and to understand the
plight of the super-rich who have come across a little financial trouble. Not interested.
54. The Loneliest Planet – This could have been
really, really good had it been less than 45 minutes long. Instead we get long drawn out movie that had
two or three really good scenes and nothing else much happening.
Tier 7
55. The Campaign – Ridiculous. And not in a good way.
56. Men In Black 3 – The reviews kind of convinced
me that this could be good. They were
wrong.
57. The Hobbit
– I never fall asleep in the theater but this one had me snoozing.
58. Simon Killer – Just a really pointless,
thoughtless, and laborious film.
Films I wish I would have seen that might have made it high
on my list: Lincoln, This is Not a Film, The Imposter, Searching
for Sugarman, Life of Pi, Footnote, The Gatekeepers, The Law in These Parts,
Rust and Bone, The Turin Horse, Once Upon A Time in Anatolia, Cosmopolis.
Here are my top performances of the year. I call it the MasterNateOrs (Master = master
of their craft, Nate = because I get to choose, and Ors = equals actORS).
The Best Male Performance in a Supporting Role:
*1 Phillip Seymour Hoffman – The Master
2 Leonardo DiCaprio – Django Unchained
3 Matthew McConaughey – Killer Joe
The Best Female Performance in a Supporting Role:
*1 Ann Dowd – Compliance
2 Amy Adams – The Master
3 Anne Hathaway – The Dark Knight Rises
The Best Male Performance in a Lead Role:
*1 Joaquin Phoenix – The Master
2 Denis Lavant – Holy Motors
3 Denzel Washington – Flight
The Best Female Performance in a Lead Role:
*1 Jessica Chastain – Zero Dark Thirty
2 Emmanuelle Riva – Amour
3 Quvenzhane Wallis – Beasts of the Southern Wild
The controversial Kevin Smith movie. From what I heard, some people hated this movie and I can partially see why. Just don't go into this movie with any expectations except to see a religious action/horror flick and you'll be ok.
